Looking Back at 2023 (A Reflection of my CD Journey in 2023)

I can't believe that I managed to squeeze out 6 blog postings in less than half a month. It has been a mad rush but I still managed to complete blogging about my first overseas CD gathering postings before 31st Dec 2023. I guess I will take some time to look back at this year from Francesca perspective and also Francesca's wish for the coming new year. 

Looking back at 2023, it was a year of Lows and Highs. I started this year on a bad note as my original lair's landlord was "accusing" me of using too much electricity and suspected me doing bitcoin mining, hence incurring high utilities bill on his end. This was much to my surprise as I hardly go back to my lair due to the busyness with my work. I did suspect that this was just a plot by the new landlord as an excuse to increase my rental price since an increase in GST and also returning to normalcy after 3 years of COVID pandemic. With the increase of 1% GST, I understand that my landlord need to mitigate his cost but he was proposing increasing my rental from $700 + 8% GST to $1000 + 8% GST. That is really robbery or some way of getting me to leave his place. Luckily for me, one door closes, another opens. I moved to a new lair within the same area and the facilities was much newer as it was a newly renovated office unit. However, it was technically a downgrade as I was originally having 180 sq ft but now my current unit was 150 sq ft. Well, beggars cannot be choosers unfortunately. 

2023 was also a year of first. Francesca had her real first dress out session some time around end of March when my wife went for an overseas work assignment. It was a golden opportunity not to be missed and I was glad that I took that bold step forward to dress out in public as Francesca. Even though it was within a small vicinity called Galaxy 28 Bistro but that to me was a good start. That night, Francesca got to know quite a few CD sisters, namely Stephanie, Lulu, Candy, Ashley, Jacelyn, Yuki and Chanel. Ever since after that first dress out session, Francesca was tempted to dress out in public on her own, but because of the new lair's neighbouring unit who was always staying late in office, this made it really hard for her to go out.

In term of my alternate life, family planning was in the midst of progress but yielding no results so far. It was really frustrating and depressing when bedroom affair with my significant other was becoming more and more mundane and mechanical. There is a lack of passion and at times, I really dragged whenever I knew that she was in her period, that would mean that her fertile period was coming up... As baby planning was not going as well, both my wife and I have to seek medical help; we went to women's clinics and hospitals for checks, doing tests here and there, we tried Chinese medicine, alternative medicine and so on, but to no avail. As much as it was taxing and upsetting for my wife, I also felt the heartache and dejection as my male alter self. Plans for more complex procedures were considered and it is a hefty decision and may not yield any results in the end. This further worsen my mental and emotional stress that I was facing. In this current state of things, there is hardly any physical, mental and emotional capacity for Francesca to take form. For months, after my first dress out session, I was in my lows again.

Just when I thought things could not get any worse, my hard disk that I used to store my photos and videos of Francesca clashed. There were pre-emptive signs and I was planning to transfer all the media onto my NAS. However, my procrastination self got the better of me and I paid a high price for my laziness and over complacency. At this stage, I was quite ready to throw in the towel and quit crossdressing again. But I decided to give myself and Francesca a break and it was going to be a long break.

Around the same period of time, since I have not been dressing up, I started to see that my new lair as a white elephant, a constant money sinking liability. In the past, I would visit the lair at least once a week, but with what I was going through; coupled with work stress taking a further toll on my state of body, mind and emotion. I was like swinging by my lair only once a month. This was when I decided to bend my own rules about not co-sharing or subletting my lair out to other CD sisters. It was a tough decision but it had to be made. I was really thankful that I found 2 other CD sisters to co-share the lair with me now. Yes, I did not blog much about this even though it was considered as an important decision along my CD journey... but I guess sharing it here for my 2023 reflection would be as good. I got to know B and J from a SG CD telegram group and they were looking for a rental space unit. I decided to approach B and she shared that she had a current offer but she was still considering, she would be sharing the unit with J. This was when I decided to make the offer to them and let them visit my lair, but the only thing is... We all will be in guy mode when we meet up. We all agreed and arranged a day for my lair visit. I met them at the building lobby area before leading them up to my lair. I started to introduce the layout of my lair and also how to operate some of the stuff. It was not much of a tour but I let them consider if they wanted to co-share with me. Since I was already using half of my lair for my male alter-self storage and the other half for Francesca stuff, I did not feel it is fair to split the cost evenly among the three of us. So instead, I bear half of the whole rental cost and the other half was split between the 2 of them. Quite decisively, B and J decided on the spot and agreed with this arrangement and I handed the newly minted room keys to them. That really helped to reduce my overhead and also better utilisation for my lair, killing two birds with one stone. And with that, my lair welcomed its new tenants. 

The main highlight for 2023 and also my last part of my look back was my first overseas CD gathering organised by Joyce aka Miss Y Studio. Like I mentioned, I was at rock bottom when this invitation for a CD gathering reignite the flame of hope in Francesca. Preparation started almost like close to 2 months before the actual event, where I have to juggle my male alter self schedule and commitment and also how I can prep Francesca to be all ready for this event. I was really happy and glad to have attend this gathering where I made new CD friends and forge new bonds, it was a great pleasure knowing them, namely MM, J, HY, WE, L, MK and KT. Hanging out with other CrossDressers, having photo shoot and change parade, taking selfie/wefies like a girl. Francesca totally enjoyed herself as she was able to be a lady for a day, it was a beautiful experience. Of course, I must thank Joyce for including me in the invite for this event. It has been close to a year since I last visited her at her studio but she still have not forgotten about me. She is such an awesome organiser, a skilled Make-Up Artist and Photographer, most of all, she is a real and true friend. I was also thankful to have met KT who had also signed up for this gathering event. She is such an understanding and accommodating CD friend and I was glad to have met her in person and can became close friend. And with that note, I will bid 2023 goodbye.

Now, my wish for 2024 as Francesca... Of course, I wish I could become slimmer so that I can have more options for dresses and gowns. Yes, some of the sellers on TaoBao are not CD size friendly, or at least, they are not carrying 4XL, 5XL sizes for their dresses... My health has not been in top condition also, that is something I should really work on instead of just paying lips service where I talked and wished but no action taken... I will try to stick to my plan for intermittent fasting programme and see if I can get some Duromine to help if needed. I must really learn to control my emotion instead of using eating comfort food to destress. Hopefully, that can help to cut my body weight and size down to 75 ~ 80kg and in turn helped to reduce my double chin.

Of course, my next wish is to go for facial treatment to remove all the bumps, humps and craters on my face, especially those black head holes. Also, I was trying to find treatment for my legs scars. I really wish to remove those 5 cents and 10 cents scars on my legs so that I can wear sheer pantyhose and stockings. I have always wished to wear sheer pantyhose or stockings but due to the scars on my legs, I tend to wear higher denier pantyhose to cover them. Not that I do not like higher denier pantyhose or stockings but having a nicer legs allows me to have more options in terms of my hosiery selection.

For this coming new year, Francesca also wished to have more opportunities to dress out, meet more CD sisters and attend more CD gatherings. If that is not possible, she hope that she will be able to dress up more often in the lair at least, to rebuild her photos and videos collection that was lost in the HDD clash... Next is upgrading of make-up skills, I have always wanted to engage a MUA to properly learn how to do make-up. It was after my visit to Joyce that I know that I have still quite a long way to learn. I know that another CD sister J would be interested too. Probably a good time for me to check back at some of the FB messages and get the contact for that CD friendly MUA to conduct class for us. Besides all these, I wished to be able to update my blog more regularly, keeping it alive and vibrant so that my readers got more topics to read. I did have some inspiration after my Melaka trip. What I need is the discipline to keep writing. Haha...  

Last but not least, with 2 CD sisters sharing my lair now. I was considering of expanding to a bigger space. It is not greedy for more space but this is to allow for other sisters to use my lair as their secret base. KT did expressed her interest in renting my lair for her production. That is something I was considering also. Of course all the factors have to consider as the decision to move my lair is no longer one person's decision but a collective agreement among those sharing the room. I definitely love the current area where my lair is situated. Maybe I can give my current agent a message to check if they got any available rental space, which is bigger than my current office room size but still within a reasonable price range.

I cannot believe that I can finish this post before today ends, as we slowly march forward into 2024. Just like to wish all a Happy New Year 2024 ahead and may all your wishes come true. Not forgetting, I wish that wars on all fronts will come to an end and peace on Earth will return again. Cheers.  

My CD Journey (Part 20-D) - My First Overseas CD Gathering [The Post-Event Reflection]

Now, for the final post to conclude this overseas CD gathering. Day 3, Sunday, today marked end of the event. Continuing from where I left off. I slept at around 2am but I was awaken at 5:45am by my alarm, which I forgot to switch off. Not sure why, guess I still could not get over the excitement of this whole experience. Despite I slept like only 3 to 4 hours, I felt rather refreshed. I went downstairs to check and no one was awake yet. So I crept back to bed and snooze a little longer. At around 7am or so, I started to hear some noise downstairs, so I made my way down (yes, the villa was 2 storey type with 3 bedrooms on the 2nd floor). I was met with WE and MM but in both guy mode this time. I was quite surprised that how different they looked while in CD mode. This was technically my first time seeing them in guy mode as both of them were scheduled to do their make-up at Joyce / Miss Y Studio at an earlier time slot yesterday (9am and 11am time slot). Rather than feeling awkward since all of us were in guy mode, we just started chatting like normal, as how we did in our CD self. 

As time passed by, all the other CD sisters began to wake up. All were in their guy mode except for MK, who managed to sleep in her wig and make-up and feminine sleepwear. Joyce called to check in on us and asked if we needed breakfast. Luckily for me and KT, I prepared cup noodles, which I gotten from the minimart near the hotel the night before. Not long after, Joyce arrived with her breakfast and we all had our breakfast together. After breakfast, we started to clean up the villa a little as we were supposed to return the villa to the owner at 12pm.

As we waited for the villa owner to come and take over the property, all of us were seated outside at the courtyard. Enjoying the sea breeze while we chatted about our views and opinions about this first CD gathering organised by Joyce / Miss Y Studio, next year gathering plan and so on. Some shared with Joyce how they continued with their costume change and selfie taking until 3am in the morning, yes, some still continued after they left our room after our chatting session. Throughout this time, I can feel that all the participants were so real and true in their personalities, either their male alter self or their CD self. Everyone just managed to clique so well. The credit should go to Joyce as she was quite selective about who to invite for this event. Maybe more about this later at the reflection part. 

After the villa owner came and inspected the property to make sure all is in order, we handed over the keys and left for the studio. Throughout the journey, I was enjoying HY's stories about the CD community in Malaysia but the only difference is, we were all in our guy mode this time. Once we reached Joyce / Miss Y Studio, it was time for us to part as the event came to a close. I could feel the sadness inside each of us as we bid farewell to each other. This was especially true for some of the CD sisters who went straight off from the villa instead of gathering at the studio. I could sense that moment of downheartedness as some of the cars went their separate ways, that longing feeling that this gathering could have last a little longer. I guess we all had so much fun that seeing it come to an end or parting with new found friends felt so melancholic. 

Before we left, Joyce gave each of us a little parting gift, which she specially prepared for us. We were really surprised by this gesture and appreciated that she had put in so much effort to ensure that this event went well. As I left my luggage inside her studio and I also needed a space to pack, so some of us went up to her studio and waited for me to finish packing. I actually brought a large hard case luggage but I did not want to bring it to the villa due to space constraint as we were supposed to travel in 3 cars. 

After I completed my packing, it is time to make our way home. But before we left, we gave Joyce a heartily hug to express our appreciation to be invited for this gathering. And with a heavy heart, we bid farewell to her and that marked the end of the whole 2 day 1 night gathering event. MK suggested that the remaining few of us to grab lunch before heading to our respective destinations. We agreed and we went to a fusion Japanese restaurant to have lunch. MK, MM, J, KT and myself went for lunch at the restaurant recommended by MK. At the restaurant, we were met up with MK close lady friend who joined us for lunch. It was great to make another new friend on this trip. This restaurant served interesting Jap food and I would not mind coming back again next time, either as Francesca or my male alter-self. 

After lunch, it is really time for us to part ways... KT and I began our trip back to Singapore. It was a long drive, taking around like close to 6/7 hours but it was really great to have KT as my company throughout this trip. We talked from our life encounters, experiences, our ups and downs, so many things to talk about. I really appreciate her and was really glad to met her face-to-face. I was not expecting anything initially but having her by my passenger side made the long drive return trip back to Singapore so vibrant. After we reached KT's house, it was time for us to say farewell to each other. We gave each other a light hug as we were both glad to have made another good CD friend through this gathering.

Finally, it was time for me to head back home and put this whole overseas CD gathering to full stop; time for Francesca to head back into hibernation mode again. As much as this closure sounded downhearted, I knew Francesca had her fun and her time through this gathering trip. She was so recharged and alive and had fun. She totally enjoyed been herself for the last 3 days and that was enough. Until next time, and with that, Francesca will like to bid all good bye (for now), take care and thank you for following me through this long 4 parts posting.

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Post-Event Reflection

After the dust has settled and the adrenaline from the excitement of this trip started to wane off, it is good time for me to look back at the event, my first overseas CD gathering organised by Joyce / Miss Y Studio. This post-event reflection was purely written by me from a neutral perspective and not paid by anyone. My aim is to be as objective as possible for others who may be interested in attending similar events organised by Joyce / Miss Y Studio next time.

Overall, the event was really well organised. Starting with the venue selection, Joyce and HY and the rest of the CD sisters chipped in with the suggestions while Joyce was hunting high and low for a nice place to organise this event. It was not an easy feat as Joyce was mindful of the amenities available in the villa. E.g. not having security camera in the villa to protect the privacy and identities of the participants, having a nice view surrounding and so on. As seen from my previous posting, the villa selected was an excellent choice but I did not really do justice to the villa as I did not take all the pictures (e.g. the porch, the pool and so on). But that villa was really lovely and perfect for this gathering.

Next, participants selection. As much as from a business start point, opening up the invitation for this gathering event to the public would yield more responses and participants. Joyce did had her reservation and consideration. As this was the first time she was organising this event, she decided to cap the number of participants to a maximum of 10 pax for easier management and she also did not open straight up to the public. In fact, she shortlisted a number of participants who had visited her studio before and she extended her invitation to them only, much like a closed door invitation. I felt that this is a very good call as the participants that she selected were someone she knew (maybe except J, who was invited by MM, but still, J blended into the group really well) and with a pleasant personality, someone who can get along well with others. I feel that most of all, we were selected as we were someone who can be truthful and real. Despite the initial plan was to have 10 CD sisters, the initial registration was actually 9 participants but one had to pull out last minute due to personal issue, that is why we ended with 8 in the end.

Next, event organisation and planning. As mentioned, the whole event was really well organised. The timing for the make-up for each crossdresser was at 2 hours, and that was quite common for Joyce as she really put in the time, effort and skills in terms of the make-up. The before and after effect as I mentioned above, there was quite a huge difference between the male alter self and CD self. Next, the travelling time to the villa from studio was at maximum 30 minutes drive, that is not too far hence not much time was spent on the roads. In terms of the planned event, I was thankful that Joyce did not plan too much activities or challenges, like the ones I experienced during my first visit to her studio, e.g. walked in super high heels with ping pong ball between the legs kind of challenge. It was purely photo-taking, bonding, chilling, karaoke-ing (if you sing), chit-chatting, selfie/wefies taking, enjoying ourselves in our full CD form. 

I feel the main highlight besides the evening gown photo-taking was the sharing session where we shared about our CD experience and journey. HY was leading the discussion while Joyce helped to manage and facilitate the session, Despite that this sharing segment can be quite sensitive for some, others may have the emotional and mental baggage to overcome, but still we were all so at ease to share our hearts out, knowing that there is no barrier or feeling of been judged or guarded. Although there was a list of planned activities, but letting the event run free and easy allowed more room for free play and exploration, e.g. some CD sisters wanted to do change parade into the different costumes or clothing they brought and take photos as they hardly got the chance to do it any other time.

To me, the whole CD gathering was more for us to know other CrossDressers, for us to interact and socialise, to share our CD journey and experiences and most of all, for us to enjoy ourselves been in the shoes as a lady for a day. That by itself really made this whole CD gathering so memorable. Hope I am not overselling this event but to me, Francesca really enjoyed herself by been a lady, to be such a beautiful lady for a day, wearing a wig for almost 12 hours straight, wearing a lady's inner and outer wear as a woman, to be mindful of the way she sit, walk and eat, to walk around in the villa fully as a woman. This experience is priceless and I will really love to do this again and again. 

Much been said, everyone's experience and expectation will be different, but I feel that the key to enjoy this type of CD gathering is to go with an open mind and open heart, out with all the judgement from the society and embrace what is to come. Things may cropped up but seeing how Joyce managed it, you can be rest assured that all will turn up well. And with that, thanks for reading. Cheers and out.

My CD Journey (Part 20-C) - My First Overseas CD Gathering [The Event]

Now, for the actual flow of event when we reached the villa. The catered dinner arrived at around 5:00pm or so. The spread for the dinner was quite reasonable, we had beehoon, curry chicken, luohan vegetables and finger food like hot dogs and fish fillet. I decided not to eat too much in order not to ruin my beautiful make-up. It was not easy eating curry chicken with make-up on but luckily I remembered my experience with Joyce for “A Day Girl’s Life First Experience” where I was made to eat a cake. So I cut and “debone” the chicken into smaller bit before eating. It is really like learning how to eat like a lady. 

The first segment of event started at around 6:00pm or so, where all of us were supposed to change to our preselected evening gown. I selected a red evening gown for this segment. It was also around this time, the other CD sister, L arrived at the villa, so the other MUA went to work immediately to start doing make-up for her. Once we changed up, Joyce asked us to go to the courtyard for our individual photoshoot by the pool. These photos would be used for a “Most Beautiful CrossDresser” competition, which was posted on Miss Y Studio Facebook page. You can see my photo below. I have to say, Joyce and her MUA friend really did an excellent work and all the CD sisters present at the gathering looks so gorgeous and beautiful that night, with the make-up and all, the gowns and everything, we looked like beautiful ladies all ready for a beauty pageant. 

After the outdoor photoshoot, we started to have some red wine while Joyce got us ready for indoor individual gown shot. As we gathered around the table and drinking and chatting, HY started asking question like how and what got us started our crossdressing journey and so on. It might not be an easy topic for some hence Joyce decided to help to facilitate this segment by asking all of us to close our eyes while she asked questions and we raised our hands if we even encountered or experienced it before. Question like, “who here started crossdressing because of encounter with female lingerie?” and many other questions that related to our crossdressing journey were discussed. She will share the results with us like majority of us had similar experience before and so on. After the ice breaker by Joyce, the sharing session started with HY sharing her own experience and her journey so far and the rest of us started to share our own CD life stories. The whole sharing session was really quite interesting and intriguing. There were emotional moments, also moments of sadness and sorrow, there were also happy and funny moments, I could feel that everyone there bare their CD persona during this segment, even Joyce also shared about her own story. I thought that this part is more like a pillow talk or girls intimate talk segment and we all should be in our nightwear or sleepwear to talk about this but we were actually still in our evening gown. However, this sharing session is really memorable and I felt that because of the sharing, all the participants there, including Joyce, got to know each other better. It is quite comforting to know that we are not alone in what we are facing in our alternate life. And with that, new bond and friendship was fostered among us.  

After the sharing session, some of the CD sisters started to sing karaoke (yes, there is a karaoke machining in the villa) while some other sisters decided to change from their evening gowns to other costumes that they brought, L brought her baju kurung, KT worn her cheongsam, MM worn a Victorian dress. I wore back my teal one piece dress while HY worn a maid costume to stage a funny shot together. The whole session was so lively and fun. There were frequent costume change by the CD sisters there and then. For me, I did not bring much this trip, which I did regret a little but nonetheless, I was having fun and enjoyed my time with all the participants. Throughout this time, we were just using this opportunity to take photos of ourselves in different costumes or clothing, selfies, wefies and videos and all. Really an enjoyable time with all the CD participants here. It just feel like a girls' or ladies gathering.   

As the night was getting late, Joyce decided to head back home and come back to the villa tomorrow morning. We assured that everything would be okay before she took her leave. I decided to change to my sleep gown and shapewear as my night gown and joined the rest of the CD sisters in the hall area. The rest of them also started to wind down a bit, we just sat on the sofa to chit chat while KT was enjoying her karaoke session. The talk mainly revolved around the CD life and how their male alter self was managing. I was really glued to listen to all their experience and encounter but after days of not getting enough sleep (due to overexcitement and anticipation), my eyelids were getting heavy… 

And with a heavy heart, I bid good night to the CD sisters who were still in the main hall before retiring back to my bedroom. I was really, really tempted to go to bed as Francesca, with all my make-up and wig on but I was afraid of making a mess. Joyce did asked us to bring a towel for the pillow in the event if we decided to sleep with our make-up on but I do not want to run the risk of ruining the pillow or my wig or my CD clothing as they are so delicate. So I removed my make-up and change to my normal sleeping clothing, singlet and shorts then head to bed. 

Quite unexpectedly, KT also came back to the room not long after and also decided to remove her make-up and head for bed. But before long, MK, MM and J came over to our room (yes, it was twin sharing for all of us, I am in the same room as KT) and we continued our conversation. Quite surprising, despite that I was all tired, I was at all ears when MM shared about her domestic situation and the reason he CD. I was experiencing the similar things as her in terms of my marriage life and why I CD. It is quite amazing to find CD friends who shared almost identical life experiences that drove us to CD. We chatted from around 12pm to almost 2am. As time was really late, KT and I decided to hit the sack and call it a night while the other CD sisters left the room. 

The night ended as I slowly lay to rest. In Francesca’s heart, she was all happy and grinning ear to ear as she slept. Francesca was all grateful for this first overseas CD gathering organised by Joyce / Miss Y Studio as it was technically the 2nd time she dress out and meeting other crossdressers. She totally enjoyed the experience today and meeting other crossdressers who shared similar life experiences let her feel that she is no alone in what she had to handle in her alter self. Thank you Joyce for organising this CD gathering. I do look forward to the next one again soon. Cheers.

My CD Journey (Part 20-B) - My First Overseas CD Gathering [The Journey]

Continuing from the previous post… As the day of the gathering drew closer, Francesca was all hype up ready for the CD gathering. As the actual event is starting on a Saturday to Sunday, instead going to Melaka on Saturday itself, which would probably met with hours of delay on the road. I decided to head over to Melaka on Friday instead, one day earlier.

Before heading over to Malaysia, I went to pick up another Singapore CD sister KT, who had also signed up for the gathering event. I have always wanted to meet KT in person as I followed her on FaceBook, Instagram and Twitter. Based on her postings on social media, she seemed like someone who is quite intellectual and that really piqued my interest to meet her face-to-face. I reached the place where KT stayed. Me in my male alter self, I was all excited to be able to meet her in person. I exited my car and help her with her luggage. In the midst of that, I dropped my phone outside the car and almost drove off. Luckily I calmed myself down and decided to do a check and found my phone on the floor just next to my car. What an episode. 

KT is really a nice and accommodating CD sister, we slowly warmed up to each other as we chatted along the way to Malacca. Throughout the journey, there was never a dull moment with her around as we got so many common topics to talk about. The whole journey took us like almost 5 hours as we reached the 2nd link checkpoint at 6am but we only managed to reach Malacca at around slightly after 11am. 

Day 1 in Malacca was marked with some activities followed by a really late lunch / early dinner around the hotel I booked, the Noble Resort Hotel Melaka (which is under the same management under The Straits Hotel and Suites). In order to “live” my alter self for the next 1 day or so, I went to Jonker Walk Night Market to buy some local snacks and delights before retiring back to the hotel as it was drizzling in Malacca. Before the night ended, both KT and I were able to meet another fellow CD sister MK, whom I was also dying to meet. MK decided to join us for a night in Malacca instead of travelling up from JB the next day. So I actually changed my booking for a twin sharing room to a three pax sharing room one day before the trip to cater for this. And with that, it ended the activities for Day 1 (Friday).

Day 2, Saturday, the day of the actual event. The three of us checked out of the hotel and proceed to Joyce / Miss Y Studio to do make up first before proceeding to a chartered AirBnB villa where the actual event would take place. As according to the plan, I would have to park my car around the studio then take one of the three cars over to the villa. The reason that Joyce did not want us to drive is because she was worried that we were not able to drive in heels, plus there is limited parking space in the detached house area. This is the part where I got a bit worried about having to park my car in the open. However, I still decided to follow according to plan and leave my car around the studio area and pray hard that everything will turn up well. 

Anyway, back to the actual flow of things. When KT, MK and myself arrived at Miss Y Studio, there were another 4 CD sisters who had already dress-up with make-up and all. Surprisingly, instead of feeling uneasy or guarded (which I normally would), I was quite at ease to meet them while in my male alter self. We arrived around the studio 12:30pm as KT and my make-up timing were scheduled around 1pm. Since there was only 2 Make-Up Artists (MUAs) including Joyce, MK can only do her make-up after us, which was originally scheduled at 3pm. Before make-up, we had to change into our female outdoor clothing then we went to our respective MUAs for make-up. Joyce and her fellow MUA were really professional as they did their best to accentuate the best features on our faces, e.g. the eyes, lips and so on while helping to ensure that the whole make-up on the face is well-balanced and can bring out that CD persona within us. I really love the make-up phase actually as I sat there while Joyce did her magic with her make-up palette and brushes. I can see how my male alter self slowly transformed into the beautiful Francesca and that was so amazing. Make-up took almost 2 hours and we were still on scheduled. After I was done, Joyce started doing the make-up for MK while I started packing what I needed for the night and also the next day, these included my feminine sleepwear (for a night pillow talk segment), make-up removal kit, toiletries, my guy’s clothing, sandals and chargers into my spare 60L gym bag, this was because we would need to travel light, more about this later. 

As much as things were going well according to plan, there was something that cropped up last minute. One of the CD sisters who was scheduled for 3pm make-up session could not make it on time as her scheduled bus was late. It was running a bit late now, so instead of waiting for her at the studio, Joyce decided that we should move off to the villa while she packed her make-up kit to do the make-up for that CD sister later at the villa. All of us had to travel light to the villa as we were to squeeze into 3 cars. Just a bit more information about this gathering, there are a total of 8 CrossDresser sisters who signed up for this gathering event. I will not be naming them but using abbreviation for their names instead, they were KT, myself, MK, MM, J, HY, WE and L. Since L was late, the 7 of us and 2 MUAs would need to squeeze into 3 cars with all our luggage together with a few boxes that were containing evening gowns, photography equipment, make-up kit, CD accessories like costumes, jewellery, gloves and so on. That was why we discouraged from bringing our big luggage along to the villa. 

At around 4:45pm, we set off towards the villa. The journey to the villa was around a 25 to 30 minutes’ drive from the studio, so the 9 of us were split into 4 cars (the other MUA will not be staying long at the villa). KT, J and myself were seated in HY’s van. MK and MM were in Joyce’s car while WE and the MUA drove their own car over. The trip to the villa was an exciting experience for me. To be all dressed up and out as Francesca once more, but in a foreign land, chatting with other sisters while in the van and on the road.  

Once we reached the villa, there was quite a few things to unload from the cars. However, having all dressed up with make-up and all, most of us find it hard to muster up the strength and mobility to move the boxes inside, we did what we could. Inside the villa, we were all awed by the interior layout and design of the villa, the surrounding is so beautiful and there is even a sea view. I felt that this was really a perfect place to host this event. Thank you Joyce and HY for choosing this villa for this gathering. You can check out the photos of the villa below.

My CD Journey (Part 20-A) - My First Overseas CD Gathering [The Preparation]

After quite a down and depressing previous post, time for something uplifting. As the saying goes, when you hit rock bottom, the only way to go is up, that statement is so true. While Francesca was in hibernation mode to muster back her strength and desire for crossdressing, a jolt of boost came in the form of a FaceBook message. Joyce from Miss Y Studio added me to a Messenger group discussion around 19th October 2023 to talk about a CD gathering around December period.

I have always wanted to go back to visit Joyce at her studio for a long time and this message from her was like godsend. Without much hesitation, I just signed up for the gathering not knowing what to expect, but deep inside, I knew that Francesca needed this break, to be released from the emotion and mental prison that was boxing her up.

This whole gathering experience is so intriguing and I wished to be as detailed as possible in my records, this will make my blog post super long. Hence, I have decided to break it into four posts, namely the Preparation, the Journey, the Event, the Post-Event Reflection. Now on with the Preparation phase…

Ever since Francesca signed up for the gathering event, her desire in crossdressing was reignited. She restarted CrossDressing in her lair again and restarted her photos collection. But this time, the photos were saved onto the NAS instead.

Besides that, a whole lot of preparation were planned and carried before the gathering day, which is around mid-December. It might be easier for me to list it out here and do a bit of explanation with it.

Car servicing and changing of tyres

The first thing that I did was to service my car before the trip. From Singapore to Melaka is around 240km, so instead of following what I did the last time round, where I took a coach up, I decided to drive. 

Driving up instead of taking a coach has many perks in terms of the freedom of timing. Of course the downside is having the risk my car breaking down while in Malaysia or having a flat tyre. In additional, Singaporeans and Malaysians are renowned bad and rude drivers. The last thing I want was an accident on the North South Highway, which is quite common… 

However, having said that, I still decided to drive up to Melaka. In order to mitigate the risk of my car breaking down. I sent my car for servicing and also replace my tyres, which are running bald, with new ones. This is the part where I have a huge dilemma. As much as I wanted to be safe on the road, I do fear that my new tyres might get stolen if I parked in Malaysia. I have heard of a horror story where a car parked in KSL for some time found the tyres stolen from it. 

In order to address my own concern, I decided to order a car exterior cover from Shopee so that I can cover the car. That might somehow discourage people from seeing my car, thereby giving it a miss. Anyway, more about the car and parking later stage/post.         

Pedicure, Manicure, Eyebrow and Nasal hair trimming

Almost less than two weeks before the gathering day, I decided to source for pedicure and manicure package for men. The reason why I want to do pedicure and manicure is because the way I cut my nails. As a male alter-self, I cut my nails using the simplest way, cut the nails based on the nail bed lining. Because of that, my nails, both on my hands and feet, grew straight out with very sharp edges… There were times where I hook and destroyed my pantyhose or lingerie because of my nails. So instead of simply cut and filing my nails, I decided to go for a pedicure and manicure session. 

I was thankful that I found a one-stop aesthetic centre called Vedure in Wheelock Place where they not only offered pedicure and manicure, they also do eyebrows and nasal hair trimming for men. All can be done in one location. Without thinking much, I decided to do the pedicure, manicure, eyebrow and nasal hair trimming one shot. 

This is my first experience doing a pedicure and manicure, I totally enjoyed it. Having 2 aestheticians working on my hands and my feet at the same time, feeling the pampering. I can totally understand why ladies love to go for pedicure and manicure session now.

After the pedicure and manicure, session, I asked if I can also do my eyebrows and nasal hair trimming. I was quite luckily that there is a slot available immediately and I took it without a second thought. I have been doing a bit of eyebrows plucking when I CD but I think I did a terrible job. In fact, I think I overpluck some parts as the aesthetician mentioned that there is a gap in my eyebrows. She also commented that I do not really need to do a brow job because she did not do much expect plucking those stray hairs around my eyes and eyebrows. 

Lastly, nasal or nose hair trimming. I can always do my own nose hair trimming before I make-up but I decided to also engage the aesthetician to do it for me since I am already there. After the whole session, I felt so ready for the gathering.

Hair cutting and colouring

My male alter-self is quite haggard looking, with grey and white hair all over my head. It looks worst when it becomes long. Since I was in Orchard area, I might as well go to a hair salon for hair cutting and colouring. It is not the first time I am colouring my hair but I sort of stop colouring over the years because I realised that there is no end to my white/grey hair. I just let them grow all over. 

In order not to frighten any one at the gathering and to look my best. I have decided to do trimming and colouring. However, I am not going for any fanciful in case my wife will ask why out of sudden I do such a drastic change to my hair. And with that, I am one step closer to be ready for the CD gathering in Melaka.

Removal of body hair

As mentioned in my previous posts, I have been engaging Smoovee Skin Korean Hair Removal Services since I have one around where I stayed. So far, I am quite pleased with the results. Even though it is not total hair removal but the hair growth on my legs and armpits have slowed down and all I need to do is a maintenance visit once a while. Maybe once every 6 to 8 weeks. You can try stretch that maintenance visit even longer and there is no impact since the hair growth has been retarded. For example, my legs hair really have very little hair roots left. So each time after a visit, I can go as long as more than 3 months and I only got few fine hairs growing here and there.

So in order to be totally ready for the CD gathering, I decided to do hair removal for my “full-beard”, armpits, both legs and of course, full boyzillian. It was a full and long session but with the removal of all these body hair, I feel that I am truly ready to unleash Francesca.

With all these preparation work and pampering of Francesca, she is all ready for her transformation under the skilful hands of Joyce (or Miss Y). Francesca was so looking forward to her visit to Miss Y Studio and also attend the gathering as a beautiful lady. All the anticipation and excitement, she is feeling the thrill as the days started counting down…