I am on a writing streak these few days, maybe because it is the month of December. Anyway, back to the topic title, if you are caught between a rock and a hard place, you are in a difficult situation where you have to choose between two equally unpleasant courses of action. Why this topic title for this blog post? Well, it has to do with one of the questions that Joyce (Miss Y Studio owner) asked me when I was at the studio.
She asked me, if I were to caught by my wife, would I rather
1. Admit that I crossdress? OR
2. Admit that I am having an affair outside?
Note: this question is not related to the challenge for "A Day Girl’s Life First Experience" but more of a starter topic that is like an ice breaker question...
Though the statement sounds a bit vague. Remember a blog post I did earlier on The Women’s Charter (CrossDresser’s Dilemma of Coming Out), the idea is to remain in the closet for as long as possible and keep it a secret. If you are always cautious and cover your tracks well, your CD habit/hobby may be well kept for as long as it gets. However, if you were caught, well… if your wife found out those CD studio shots of you in crossdressing costumes, those are pure evidences right in front of her. I guess there is no way to wriggle out of it. Or if your wife caught you while you are in the midst of dressing up. I guess it is quite evident that you are a crossdresser… No way to argue over it. I think in both these cases, the best is just to come clean…
Under what circumstances will this question asked by Joyce ever occur? For one, I always have female lingerie shipped to my house and at times, the mailbox. What if one day my wife accidently open up my parcel and saw brasseries and panties that are way too big for her… Or an accidental slip where I forgot to bring some of my CD wears back to my lair after washing and my wife found them under my bed. That can trigger the question as stated. I guess you get the picture… You are not caught in the act of CrossDressing, there is no solid evidence to indicate that you are a crossdresser, just maybe some oversized lingerie that do not belong to your wife found by her in the bedroom and your wife asked you to come clean. Of course I mean we can argue that we are having some fetish for lingerie and that can possibly get away with it but what if... those two questions were asked and you have to choose one... Would you choose to confess that you are a crossdresser? Or deny and say that it was just a moment of folly and that belongs to some other girls…
Quite interestingly, Joyce shared that most of those who visited her studio claimed that they will choose to admit to having an affair than to admit that they crossdress. For me, I was caught in a fixed too by this question. Both are equally unpopular choices that have dire consequences. Of course some may choose to come clean and hopefully the wife will accept, like Isabelle’s case. However, I also heard of a few cases where coming clean lead to divorce…
I think my answer to Joyce was similar to others, I will admit to having an affair instead. It seems like a suicidal move but in one sense, it can help to protect that dignity of my male persona. I mean, if the worst happened, words would not get around that I crossdress as a female. At least I will still appear as a normal man, but who is unfaithful rather than having something that is not well accepted in the Asian culture. Not sure if my rationale sounds logical enough but choosing to admit to an extra-marital affair can still help to safekeep the views that I am still a straight man in front of others. Do not get me wrong, I am not gay or what but the problem is, Asians tend to associate CrossDressing to gays or guys who are not straight and also the shame for a male to dress up as a female under normal circumstances. Hopefully with time moves on, people will be more accepting of CrossDresser as a norm. This is purely view and speculation and I really hope that this day will never ever come true. Maybe if it were to happen, maybe my decision will change? I don’t know… Let’s just keep it a secret for now and as long as it can get…
So my dear readers, what will you choose?
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